Apostle Steven W. Banks, delivered a message last Sunday that was deeper and more introspective than I could appreciate at the time. The message related to God’s desire and ability to renew our strength and, as the Apostle mentioned upfront, it wasn’t going to be what we wanted to hear. Like most messages on waiting, we give it a tepid response and then wonder why it doesn’t manifest a major change in their lives. But I know that anticipation leads to manifestation, and I know that Apostle Banks has always delivered timely words into my life so I opened up my level of anticipation and took in the word on Sunday. I still didn’t get the message so I then listened to it again on Destiny Cast and again in the car. Each time I listened to it I heard God say “ I will renew your strength” and I would silently and respectfully reply “Don’t bother, just give me what I asked for now.”
By Thursday morning, I hit a breakthrough after dropping the kids off at school. (Yes, I just mentioned that part because I wanted you to know that I’m a good dad that takes his kids to school.) After dropping the kids off (Yep, there it is again) I headed to my government job with the good benefits, stable salary and byzantine list of rules and regulations. I thought about a certain high level purchasing document that I’m putting together. In short, I have to put together a 10 page paper, advertise and receive proposals from firms, create a review committee to review those proposals, rank and score them, conduct interviews and negotiate with the best firm. I must do all this in order to award a contract for a few hundred thousand dollars that, by policy, will expire before 5 years.
In my history with this process, the winning firm is ecstatic in the first year of the contract and then frustrated and upset in the fifth year when it’s all over. They ask if I can renew the contract and I tell them that the policy won’t allow me to renew the contract beyond five years. If they want the contract, they must start the process all over again. This is much like my current life. I was ecstatic over the word that God was speaking over my life five years ago. I was full of faith and hopeful. However, in the past several months, my faith has waned and my frustration level has peaked. The worst part, however, is that I feel like I’m hitting a five year wall where I have to start the process over again (pray, sow, believe, hear a word from God, act on it then wait).
So, while listening to Apostle Banks’ message again, and thinking about my job’s purchasing process I, once again, hear God say “ I will renew your strength”. But this time I get a completely different appreciation of the statement. I realize that God is not saying He will give me strength to hold on for a few more years. God is saying what I can’t say to those firms at the end of their 5 year contract. God is acknowledging that I struggled and strained and pleaded and hoped and exercised perfect faith five years ago. He’s saying that He knows that my frustration and anger has risen lately and I’m not where I used to be. AND He is saying that He’s going to renew the promise and the blessings He has in store for me based on my strong faith of five years ago.
So instead of coming to the end of a period, I am being given a new five year window of blessings BASED ON the perfect faith I exhibited when I was fresh and hopeful. God is saying not to worry about the recent issues I’ve had. God is saying to me, “I will renew your strength” and to that I can now reply, “Thank you Lord. Thank you for the strength to carry on.”
Philip Page, Jr.





